Boy! Am I On a Roll Today!

So, this post is a little more light hearted than my last few posts, but I feel compelled to share.  I have had rather an odd day today.

 I ended up being up til 3 a.m. working on homework for today, so I decided to skip my 8 a.m. class (whose idea was an 8 a.m. class anyway!?) So, I slept until 8ish and started getting ready for work.  I was running a little behind, but I figured, no problem, I can take the expressway and be out there with 10 minutes to spare.  NEVER ASSUME!! lol

So, I start to head out to my car and my dad tells me I have a flat.  Great! Just what I need when I'm already running behind.  So, I drive my pitiful car, very slowly, to the gas station and put air in the tire and start heading in to work.  I think I only ended up being about 20 min. late, which really isn't that bad, all things considered.

After I'd been there for a little while, I took a bathroom break.  Nothing strange about that.  It's a fact of nature. Everyone has to go.  So, there you have it.

This might sound like a rabbit trail right here, but it is relevant, I assure you.  We have some new cleaning people here at work.  I admit no one was sad to see the Stinky Guy go.  (If you wanna know more about him, just ask lol)  But at first, these new people were throwing away the toilet paper rolls when they weren't completely empty just so they could refill the dispenser.  That has since changed.  They are now leaving the rolls, either on top of the dispenser or on the back of the toilet.  And now, back to my story . . .

So, I was exiting the stall and somehow (I have no idea how really) I must've knocked one of those extra rolls off of wherever it had been placed, because it was on the floor and in my effort to leave the stall, I kicked it.  At that precise moment, the bathroom door flings wide open.  Here is the scene that met the poor gal coming in.  Me, standing in the doorway of the stall, watching the toilet paper roll down the entire length of the bathroom, past the other stalls and down under the handicap stall.  She took it in stride though, and simply said 'Oh! TPing the bathroom??' haha I guess you could say that.

She then stood there and watched as I squatted down (very unladylike) and checked for feet under the handicap stall.  If there'd been someone in there . . . well, they'd probably have been startled! hahah  Thankfully, no one was in there, so I went in and retrieved the runaway roll of toilet paper.

All I can say is, there's never a dull moment with me, but some days are more hilarious than others.

God's Promises Are Not Slack

As I sit here, staring at my screen, I have so many thoughts running through my mind.  That is nothing unusual.  I have always had a mind that worked a million miles a minute.  Especially at night, my thoughts seem to sort of churn.  They can range anywhere from: "I think I'll wear this sweater tomorrow to class" to "Will my financial situation ever be normal?" Many people can lay down, close their eyes and they are asleep in minutes.  Not me, I was never like that.  It's part of the reason I stay up so late--so that when I do finally lay down to sleep, I won't lay there awake forever.

But I digress.  Tonight I have many thoughts bouncing around in my head.  I'm thinking that I am so thankful for the people in my life who care about me.  My family, my friends, my church, not to mention my Savior.  And I know that when things get too tough for me to handle (which is often these days) I have people that I can confide in.  People who care about me and who will support me.  I have a God who specializes in meeting needs that no one else can.  God even says that when I am at my weakest, that's when He can show Himself strong.

I was reading tonight in Psalms.  David prays so often for deliverance from his enemies and for God's help and it comforted my heart to read that tonight.  I find myself getting so anxious at times about my family's current situation.  My dad's illness is such that it will only get worse, and I wonder sometimes "How will this all play out?"  There is going to come a point when my dad won't be able to drive anymore.  He won't be able to work.  He won't be able to do a lot of things.  It's a scary thing for me to think about.

When I was a little girl, my daddy was always the one who tucked me in at night and made sure there were no boogeymen lurking about.  He got rid of mice and spiders and the occasional snake.  He took us to church and drove us in the car to go see grandma.  I thought he could do anything.  And now, slowly, those things are being taken away from him.  It is beyond his control and it is beyond mine.  But you know whose control it is not beyond?? God's!!

One thing that is so amazing about God is that He knows everything.  He is omniscient.  He knows what has happened, what is happening and what will happen.  And nothing takes Him by surprise.  When my dad was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease, God didn't have to take the afternoon off to process it.  That's because He has been planning for it all along!  I don't have to worry because God has everything under control.

Psalm 30:8-12
8) I cried to thee, O LORD; and unto the LORD I made supplication. 9) What profit is there in my blood, when I go down to the pit? shall the dust praise thee? Shall it declare thy truth? 10) Hear, O LORD, and have mercy upon me: LORD, be thou my helper. 11)  Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness; 12) To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent.  O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.


As I read this tonight, I was thinking a few different things.

1. I can make supplication to God for my circumstances.  I'm so thankful that we have the Holy Spirit because He knows our hearts and can convey them to God even when we have no words.
2. God is there to be our helper, but we need to ask Him.  I am so guilty of trying to do things myself, only to fall flat on my face and realize I need God's help.
3. God can take my sad circumstances and give me joy. 
4. David gave thanks to God in His circumstances and goes on to say 'I will give thanks unto thee for ever'.  I need to give thanks to God for His hand in my life.

This last isn't a new lesson for me by any means, but I've learned in life that when we go through icky circumstances, it is for our own good to build us into stronger people and God uses it to shape us into His image, but sometimes along with that, He puts us in these circumstances so we can be an encouragement to someone else.  Maybe we don't even have anything good to say other than "I understand". I think that can be enough.  So maybe at some point in my life, I'll be able to look at a friend who is going through these same circumstances and say "I've experienced what you're going through and no it is not easy.  I understand how you feel, but God will bring you through it because He has promised you He will."

I'm So Thankful God Had the Right Idea

As I've grown older, I always had a picture in my mind of what I would be when I was 'grown up'.  I would be married, of course, I'd have several children or I'd be working a great job and driving a nice car.  My mother was married when she was 22, so I figured I'd probably follow along those lines.  God had a different idea.  I know it must've been His, because I know it wasn't mine. :)

• It wasn't my idea to be single at the age of 30.

• It wasn't my idea to be stuck in dead-end jobs leading no where.

• It wasn't my idea to still be in school at the age of 30.

• It wasn't my idea to drive a demon-possessed car that hates me (although I am still hoping for a Damascas Road experience, so Damian's name can be changed to Damon.  We'll see.)

• It wasn't my idea for my dad to be diagnosed with Prostate Cancer and then Diabetes and then Parkinson's Disease.

I could go on and on, but the truth is, even though these things were not what I wanted, it was what God saw fit to give me.  He knows what I need much better than I do and He knows what's coming for me down the road and what I need to be ready for it.  I don't want you to think that I'm complaining either.  The fact is that a lot of the things that I have gone through were not pleasant, but God has used them to shape me into the person that I am.  Love me or leave me, but that's why I am the way I am. :)

On the flip side of the above list, I will say this:

• I might be single, but I have a God who loves me more than any man ever could.  He knows how many hairs are on my head.  That's how much He cares about me.  Besides that I have a multitude of friends, some who are just like family to me.  They tell me they love me on a regular basis.  I am loved. :)

• I may have worked some dead-end jobs, but those jobs have also provided me with some of the skills that I use in the jobs I have now.  Working at McDonalds wasn't pleasant, but it gave me a great ability to interact with the public.  Working at the cleaners wasn't always fun but it taught me about responsibility and working with others.  Working at the Wilds Christian Camp . . . well, that was fun! haha

• I might be in school still at the age of 30, but guess what! I'll graduate when I'm 31 and I couldn't be more excited! The end is in sight!  I have worked hard and I'm ready to put myself out there.  Not to mention, I'll be doing something that I have trained for and that I am somewhat good at! This is exciting to me!!

• I was in a serious car accident last winter, so even though the car I have is not awesome, I am so thankful just to have a car (still waiting . . . ) :) and also to be alive!

• As for my dad, it's so hard to say, I'm thankful that my dad is sick.  But throughout all of this, we have seen God meet some mighty important needs in our family.  When my dad needed surgery to remove his cancer, we thought 'How in the world are we ever going to come up with 80,000 dollars??' Well, the fact is we couldn't.  But God could! He is amazing like that.  he provided the money necessary. As for my dad's illnesses.  His cancer is gone.  His Diabetes is under control.  But his Parkinson's will never get any better and God knows that.  He will give us the grace we need, as we need it. I can be thankful for God's grace and that same grace will help me to be thankful for his sickness.

God has used all of these things to shape me into the person that I am and because of that, I would not change what has taken place.  I can only go on from here and aspire to be a better person with God's help.

I just thought with it being November and all and Thanksgiving creeping up on us, that it would do to state some things that I am, indeed, thankful for.